SOME KOREAN CUSTOMS

• Affection between the sexes is not shown in public. Affection between people of the same sex is a way of showing friendship.

• Anger Showing anger is impolite, and can permanently damage interpersonal relationships. Keep your temper at all times.

• Bargaining In markets, you are expected to bargain. After asking the price, give the seller a counter-offer. Finally, agree on a price somewhere between the seller's offer and your own. Bargaining is not done at supermarkets, department stores, or other places where the price of merchandise is already marked.

• Bathrooms The same public bathrooms are sometimes used by both men and women. Women walk past men's urinals on their way to private booths. Bathrooms in homes often have wet floors, so plastic thongs are worn whenever entering the bathroom.

• Bowing is done when greeting another person for the first time in a day. If the discrepancy in status is very great, only the person of lower status bows, while the other responds verbally. When two people are introduced, they also bow.

• Criticism should be avoided whenever possible. When absolutely necessary, it must be done tactfully, gently and privately.

• Dress is a sign of position, so it is important not to dress too informally. Also, it is a sign of respect. So when meeting people, or when visiting someone's home, one should dress nicely and conservatively. Shorts, back-less dresses, and so on are not appropriate in public.

• Drinking is an important part of social and business relationships for men in Korea. The amount of alcohol consumed at any given time is generally considerably more than most Westerners are accustomed to consuming.

• Eating is done with chopsticks and a large spoon. Rice is served on the left, and soup on the right. The person of highest status should begin the meal. Excessive talking during the meal is considered impolite. Slurping is acceptable as a sign of enjoyment.

• Education is highly valued in Korea. Young students study extremely hard. Highly educated people are respected, and what they say is listened to carefully.

• Elderly people should be shown kindness and respect at all times. Bus seats should always be offered to them. If an elderly person has trouble crossing the street or trouble carrying something, a younger person is obliged to help.

• Generosity towards friends and acquaintances is important. This includes giving gifts that are worth a bit more than one might expect. This also means preparing more food for guests than would be necessary by Western standards. Being at all stingy is impolite.

• Gifts are very important. Fruit, flowers, cakes or alcohol should be given whenever visiting someone's home. On special occasions, such as a first birthday, a gift is also appropriate. When one attends a wedding, a 60th birthday party or a funeral, money in an envelope is appropriate.

• Harmony Social harmony should be preserved at all costs. This sometimes requires small lies, and often less efficient, indirect ways of behaving than in the West.

• Invitations are generally given informally. They are usually verbal. And not always given by the person hosting the event. Invitations are rarely given more than a few days in advance, and sometimes only a few hours before the event.

• Kimchee is the national food. It is pickled Chinese or napa cabbage and is usually quite spicy. Eat it cautiously at first. Koreans will be very pleased to see you enjoy your kimchee.

• Most expatriates employ maids in Korea. You can expect them to clean, wash clothes, cook and look after children. Their status is lower than that of their employer and they are most comfortable working when that distinction is clear.

• Money When giving a gift of money or when paying an employee, money should be put in an envelope. Money is only exposed when paying at the market or at a store.

• Passing objects When passing objects to someone of equal or higher status, use the right hand. To show the most respect, two hands are used, or the right hand supported by the left. When passing objects to people of lower status, either hand is acceptable, but using two hands is not appropriate.

• Patience is highly valued. When services are not performed on time, someone is late, or things are not done efficiently, large amounts of patience are necessary. In such cases, blaming and showing anger are quite inappropriate.

• Paying is done by the person who did the inviting. 'Going Dutch' is never done. If there is a question as to who made the invitation, the bill is fought over. Paying is considered an honour and also a matter of pride.

• Personal questions are a way of getting to know another person. If you do not wish to answer them, simply change the subject. These questions may include 'Why aren't you married'?' and 'How old are you'?'

• Rice is the staple of the Korean diet. Throwing away leftover rice is considered wasteful and bad luck.

• Singing Koreans usually sing at social gatherings. At parties, the most honoured person is given the first chance to sing. Other people are then each given a turn. Be prepared to sing a song or two at any social gathering.

• Shoes should he removed before entering someone's home, or when entering a temple. In offices and other public places. shoes are not removed.

• Status is very important. It is determined primarily by one's profession, family and age. Acknowledging other people's status will make social relationships smoother. It is also necessary to act according to one's own status.

• Tipping is not usually necessary in Korea. At some first-class hotels, a service charge is automatically added to the bill. If the service at a restaurant, hairdresser or in a taxi has been especially good, a small tip would he appreciated.

• Titles When addressing Koreans, always include their title. For example, Manager Kim, President Lee, Assistant Director Park. This shows respect and helps to identify the innumerable Mr Kims. Mr Lees and Miss Parks. If you can learn to say the titles in Korean. a closer feeling will be established.

• Touching children is a natural expression of interest and affection. Once used to it, children enjoy the attention given to them. Sometimes children are touched to discover their sex. This is considered acceptable and normal behaviour.